tel: 01472 575757
THE REFUGE

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Residents speak out
What Tracey says:
I have two little girls aged 4 and 7 years old. When I first got to Grimsby I was scared and frightened, I was out of my hometown away from my family and friends and when I arrived at the refuge I was more frightened. I did not know anybody at all. We walked in and I looked around, I thought ...
 
What Vanessa says:
Should your partner be able to; Stop you from going to sleep, Wake you up constantly because he can’t sleep, Tell you it’s your fault he’s like this, Accuse you of seeing other men and ringing them, Tell you that you are ugly, fat and boring, Make ...
 
What Wendy says:
The abuse started three weeks into the relationship, he came home drunk, started saying things to me then unexpectedly he put his hands around my throat. After a few seconds of struggling he let go. After he started kicking me, I was shocked and upset and sat crying he just flaked out and went to bed, I put it down to the alcohol. The next day he said he didn’t remember ...
 
What Ben says:
I will never understand why we had to stay or why we couldn't get out when things got bad. Mum and Dad used to say everything would be alright - but it kept happening - the same things, over and over and over again ...
 
 
Some Thank You cards

Annie Says:

"I would like to thank you all for the help you gave me and my children during our stay with you. When we first arrived we were just a scared and confused family ...more"

 
 

Click to the Help Page

The local refuge
EntranceThe refuge is a safe house where women and children who are experiencing domestic abuse can live free from violence. The Refuge address is confidential. You can chose to stay in the local refuge or you may want to go out of town for safety.

If you are experiencing any form of domestic violence you can ring the local refuge on 575757 for advice, information or just someone to talk to. We can also provide you with emergency temporary living accommodation if you need to leave your home.


What will my accommodation be like?

Living RoomWe opened our refuge in December 2006. We have nine self-contained and fully equipped flats that comprise of a living/dining room, a bathroom, a kitchen and two bedrooms. We also have two bedsits for women with no children.

Ocasionally we have to ask women with no children, or maybe just one child, to share a two bedroomed unit. This is only done when demand is extremely high or in emergency situations.

The qulality and standard of the accomodation is superb. You will also have access to a shared communal room for socialising and meeting others who live in the refuge. Additionally there is a children's room, a children's garden, a quiet garden, a computer room and laundry. All staff areas and communal areas are situated on the ground floor.

Televisions are provided but every resident must have their own TV Licence. The building is well lit and alarmed and has emergency panic buttons.

Pic of kitchenAccess to the building, and private areas within the facility, is only possible with the use of security 'key fobs' which is monitored by the security system 24 hours a day. There is also CCTV devices covering the outside, doorways and internal corridors which records 24 hours a day.

 


What support will I receive?

The refuge is ‘supported’ housing accommodation. This means that your stay will offer support sessions that will include planning for your future. You can get help and support from any member of staff but you will be allocated a key worker who will work closely with you to help try and sort out any issues and plan your way forward. Your key worker will set aside time each week for you to meet. Your worker can help you with doctors, solicitors, courts, police, benefits agency, housing, etc, They will go with you if you are feeling nervous. The worker will not do everything for you but she is there to help and support you in any way she can. Most importantly support workers will offer a listening ear at a time when you probably need it most!

What should I bring with me
It is a good idea to bring some things with you but this is not always possible if you have to leave in an emergency. If you do not have time to plan to leave we can support you back into your property at a later date to get any additional items if you want to. You will not be able to bring larger items such as furniture with you to the refuge, but we can help you to find ways of storing your furniture. Also, we cannot generally take house pets (please see below).

As a guide only, think about the possessions and the documents you could bring with you:

  • identification.
  • birth certificates for you and your children.
  • school and medical records
  • money, bankbooks, cheque book, credit cards, bank statements.
  • wage slips, benefits letters, Child Tax Credit letters etc.
  • driving licence and car documents.
  • prescribed medication.
  • benefits information and identification inc. your child benefit.
  • passports, visas and work permits.
  • mortgage or rent details.
  • unpaid bills
  • insurance documents.
  • telephone and address book.
  • family photographs, your diary, jewellery, items of sentimental value.
  • children’s favourite items of clothing and small toys.
  • toiletries and clothes for you and your children.

Never attempt to remove any of the above if it is not totally safe to do so - everything can be sorted without these or we can always go back with you at a later date.

What do I do about money and rent?
Once you have left your home you are a single person and can claim social security benefits for yourself and any children you have with you. This is your right. Refuge workers can help you with this.

If you are in full or part-time regular employment that you wish to continue with, but need to go into temporary refuge accommodation as a result of domestic violence, consider discussing your situation with your manager, your boss, or your personnel officer, in confidence, in order to arrange some time off work which could be allocated as annual or sick leave. If you leave full or part time employment in order to relocate and move into refuge accommodation, your rights to benefit may be affected. You will need to discuss this with a refuge worker as soon as you move into the refuge.Image: Garden - Women's Aid

Our rent is varied according to your income. If you are on benefits then we will claim your housing benefit and you will just need to pay a top up. However, if you are working you will need to pay more according to your wage.

What about my housing situation?
You can return home from the refuge at any time. You may decide you want to return to your partner. You may decide to return to your home after your partner has left. You may want an injunction. You may decide you want to be rehoused elsewhere. The choice is yours, and refuge workers will help you to decide what you want to do.

Women usually stay with us for approximately 3/4 months. Some women stay in refuges for a break from the violence, a breathing space with time to think away from danger. Some women decide to return to the man they were living with to try again. Most women use this time of safety to plan their futures.

When you leave the refuge you can still recieve support and information or you can come back as a resident if ever you need to in the future.

What services are available for my children?
Childrens RoomWe have an excellent service for children who live at the refuge. The children have their own room and their own space that is fully equipped and staffed.

Our children's workers offer emotional and practical support to the children, but they also organise activities, events, one-to-one sessions, children's meetings and much more. A timetable of activities will be discussed with you when you move in.

We also have a Family Support Worker who can help you with boundaries, routines, behaviour, and any general parenting support.

However, the childrens service is not core funded so we do ouToysr very best through fundraising and donations to provide a limited service. We operate a playroom and childcare staff for as many hours as is possible. This gives children time to themselves and also allows the mums a few hours break. We take the children on outings, trips and days out as often as possible and try to organise communal events such as barbeques, Christmas parties etc.

After your stay at the refuge
Women's Aid has a ‘resettlement’ worker. She supports women into new properties and helps them to begin a new independent lifestyle. Planning a new home is very daunting and there is a lot to sort out, the worker can help women with this.

The worker is available to visit and support the woman on a regular basis either weekly, fortnightly or monthly. Some women are supported on an ‘as and when needed’ basis. The worker can also help women with security in their new properties by providing panic alarms, locks/bolts, etc. It has been proven that going out into a new community alone can prove very difficult and some women feel isolated and lonely. We try and help women to make contact with people and agencies that are offering help or activities in their local area.

Our worker also runs a weekly ‘survivors’ group. This group was formed at the request of women who wanted to ‘get together’ to meet informally and continue to support each other. The group occasionally invites guest speakers, providing information on benefits, training, education, employment, etc. Specialised sessions of massage, aroma-therapy, art sessions, etc., have also been offered. The group is user lead and aims to help and support women who have gone through or may still be living with domestic violence. Childcare is provided. The group meets every Friday at 9.30am. (except during school holidays)

If you or someone you know would like to come along to the group - call Maria on 240906.

Office Hours for the Refuge
Office hours are Monday to Friday 8am until 6pm, Saturday 9am until 1pm and Sunday 10am until 2pm. However staff operate an ‘on call’ system and are contactable outside these hours. Our telephone number is easy to remember: 01472 575757.

Pets
Generally, we cannot take house pets, however, we do work closely with a pet fostering organisation that may help to temporarily look after your pet(s) through the duration of your stay.

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You can contact North East Lincolnshire Womens Aid by calling: 01472 575757 or emailing us
Copyright North East Lincolnshire Women's Aid Registered All Rights Reserved © 2008. Registered Charity No. 1100136